What do you call a bean grown in the hydroponics garden off a molecular gastronomist's kitchen, that's been genetically enhanced to taste like cheese?
An Elemental Emmental Lentil.
A dog walks into a bar. The barman says:
Heya fella. Where's your owner? Huh? Where's your owner? Show me that collar there! That's a good fella. C'mere to me!
The dog was ultimately reunited with his owner, because he'd been responsibly micro-chipped. That's no joke! That's serious!
"Is it illegal to spit, officer?" a drunk man asked anIrish policeman.
"Well," the policeman said, contemplating the question. "It depends on what you're spitting at."
~This joke is based on a true story